The Truth about Love

I hesitate to admit this because I could have readers who might know me personally but I'm a romantic. Although I'm no longer a hopeless romantic, I would still say I float, to some degree, in the pool of romance. However, I do admit that there was a point in my life where I believed that someday I would be a princess's knight and shining armor.

Perhaps we all are romantics to some degree. It's our very nature. It's hard wired into our brains to seek potential partners to produce offspring that will carry our genes. What is commonly misunderstood however, is most of us, especially us younger people, mistake romantic love for true love.

Almost every movies, every songs, and other forms of entertainment today has some sort of reference to romantic love. It is portrayed as the ultimate purpose, that there is nothing else higher to live for. After all, with all the pain and suffering that comes with romance, it must be the ultimate destination, right?

Romantic Love:
   
It is what enchants the majority of the population in the west. It thrives on the idea of obtaining never ending ecstasy due to the presence of the desired. Romantic love is based on anticipation. The adrenaline rush from anticipation drives us to be addicted to the idea of the beloved. We put the beloved in a pedestal with unrealistic expectations that no single person can ever achieve. We amplify their great features and ignore their flaws.

It is often overlooked how unstable and unreliable romantic love is. When one is infatuated(another term for romantic love), he feels that the solution to all his/her problems lies in obtaining his/her beloved. This is simply not the case, when one obtains his/her desired the value of the desired depreciates in which case the person searches for other purposes in life.

Romantic love is not permanent. While there is an initial overwhelming joy in obtaining the beloved it is impossible to keep that joy. Nothing in life is permanent but infatuation often fools us into thinking so.

The trouble is, the western culture particularly in the US have relied on romantic love to gauge their readiness for marriage, resulting in the highest divorce rate in the world.

True Love:

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."- Corintians 13:4-8a.

I'm not a religious guy but I believe this quote sums up what true love really is. It loves for the sake of loving. It ask for nothing in return. It is founded on trust, and a reciprocation of the same feeling is only a bonus not a must have. It holds no expectations or anticipations. It is based on reality; loving the real person rather than the idea of the person.

Conclusion:

Simple and sound ideas, yet difficult to realize by yourself. After all, when almost every movie you watch, every song you listen to, and every status you read on facebook tells you there is nothing else other than romantic love, it is hard to believe there are other more stable, easily accessible, options out there.